Because ESFJs are caring individuals, they expect to give and receive in their relationships. Because others may not be as thoughtful as the ESFJ, it is a possible source of disappointment to them if they expect the same awareness and caring on the part of the partner. Being practical and realistic, they may not always like effusive shows of affection and prefer moderation instead. ESFJs may be more loyal to the relationship or to the institution of marriage than to the person. ESFJs may take the end of the relationship as a personal failure.

ESFJs, when scorned, hurt all over and may need to take time to get over the relationship before pursuing a new one. They may too easily, and incorrectly, blame themselves for the unfavorable outcome and recall instances when, perhaps, they were not as giving as they might have been. However, ESFJs' standards for giving in a relationship are likely to be above those of some other types. At their worst when scorned, ESFJs can become spiteful and critical of the partner. Because ESFJs are keenly sensitive to others and are tuned in to emotional needs, they really know how to hurt a person in the rare instances when they choose to do so.

ESFJ in work : At work, ESFJs contribute their ability to cooperate with others and to complete tasks in a timely and accurate way. They respect rules and authority, and handle daily operations efficiently. They tend to be well informed and up-to-date on organizational actions that matter to people. ESFJs do what they can to make sure that personal relationships are running smoothly. Because they pay close attention to people's needs and wants, they are often involved in work activities that meet people's practical, day-to-day desires.

Work Setting

ESFJs prefer a work setting that contains conscientious, cooperative, values-oriented people who work at helping others. They want to be close to the action, working most effectively in settings that are friendly, sensitive to human needs, personal, and appreciative. ESFJs may not fit in well with departments that are highly bottom-line or production oriented. They tend to operate on actual facts and realities, liking things to be organized. Where possible, they make their workspace efficient, yet warm in tone.

Organizing Style

ESFJs want answers to questions such as: who, what, when, and where. They place a special emphasis on "who". They want information and structure because it enables them to quickly help others. They are often models of organization, with a "place for everything and everything in its place". Some ESFJs like the role of organizational "historian" because they remember facts as they relate to people. ESFJs enjoy providing useful data to those who need it. After being told that someone has lost some piece of information, ESFJs will generally be able to locate it.

ESFJs plan with the needs of others in mind. They are goal oriented and enjoy getting the job done. Their responsiveness, thoroughness, and reliability can be counted on. Even when they lack technical knowledge, this is easily forgiven by others because the ESFJ is so responsive and provides assistance in the depth that others may not offer. ESFJs prefer that expectations are made clear to them. When the priorities are not straight, or are continually changing, ESFJs may feel uncomfortable until there are clear directions as to what they are required to do next.

Occupations

To perform well at work, individuals may need to use all of the eight preferences at the appropriate time and when required by the situation. Knowing this, people tend to select occupations that allow them to use the preferences that are most natural to them.

ESFJs prefer occupations that allow them to provide direct and personal, yet practical, help to others. Occupations that call for organization and goal direction appeal to them. They are especially careful not to waste time or resources; to do so would go against their nature.

While ESFJs can and do enter all occupations, some are more appealing to them than others. According to available research, some occupations (in alphabetical order) seem to be especially attractive to ESFJs: childcare worker, dental assistant, elementary school teacher, home economist, nurse, office manager, radiological technologist, receptionist and secretary, religious educator, speech pathologist, and other occupations that allow ESFJs to help others and serve their values directly. These occupations are not meant to be an exhaustive list, but serve to illustrate some areas that an ESFJ might enjoy. If your specific occupation, or one that you are interested in, is not listed here, think instead of its general characteristics and ask yourself how those fit with your type.

ESFJS in LIFE: ESFJ children want life to be uncomplicated, secure, harmonious, and structured. They are usually responsible, reliable, and cooperative. They thrive in situations in which there is consistency and personal attention. They enjoy the acceptance of others and will work hard to gain that acceptance. ESFJ children are concerned about doing the right things and pleasing their elders.

ESFJs follow the rules and tend to accept them as fair and reasonable. They admire people and teachers who are warm, friendly, and concerned. Sometimes when the rules or their enforcement are unreasonable, ESFJs may have trouble setting limits and not feeling guilty or betrayed by the system. ESFJs are concerned about the feelings of others and like to help out when possible.

ESFJs begin early to assume responsibility for the welfare of others. They believe it is necessary to give as well as to receive, and will often volunteer their time and talents in service organizations such as the YWCA and hospital candy striper groups.

ESFJs radiate warmth and fellowship, and generally fit in well with their classmates. They value the traditional things that teenagers do and may be involved in various clubs and teams. Their friends often turn to them because of their "listening ear" and helpful nature.

As young adults, ESFJs focus on their relationships and values, which generally have to do with helping others and being with compatible people. They seem to have less difficulty than some other types in making friends and accepting their roles in life.

People play a significant part in every aspect of their lives. If friends decide on a particular college, for example, ESFJs may revise their own college plans in order to be with their friends.

Often the lives of ESFJs follow a traditional pattern. ESFJs make their family responsibilities their utmost goal. They like tradition and stability and generally choose to do what is expected of them by others and society.

In adult life, ESFJs take their parent, spouse, employee, or community volunteer roles seriously and are committed to them. They are sensitive barometers to the needs of those around them, sometimes more attuned to others' needs than their own. They gain the respect of others because of their helpfulness, pleasantness, and ability to get things done. They carry out their commitments and are often in charge of events. With their high values for relationships, stability, and loyalty, they may have long tenure in their places of work. ESFJs may misread business relationships as friendships and be disappointed when changes occur and personal contacts are not maintained. Mature ESFJs often structure both their work and personal lives so that they can meet the needs of others.

For ESFJs, retirement means continuing to nurture and maintain the relationships that are most important to them. They keep their lives full of activities with people. ESFJs are recognized for doing nice, thoughtful things for others, such as sending flowers and notes, and making follow-up telephone calls. They are likely to schedule regular lunches and leisure activities with their former colleagues from work. If they have grandchildren, they will fill their time by offering to babysit, often at a moment's notice, or by helping in any way that they can.

I know the result is long... But it is interesting. Haha. Damn cool how one quiz can say so much.